Waiting

I've always had a hard time waiting. Waiting for something to happen, waiting to see someone, or even just waiting to go buy something that I want. This is something that I have really tried to work on in my own life. Because I can't control everything... and often I can't control anything. The last few months I have had to wait. Wait on doctors. Wait on progress. Wait on results. 

I have some pretty big news coming my way anytime now. And honestly the news is results that I should have had back a few weeks ago. But instead of knowing my fate, I am stilling having to wait. Could this be God teaching me something? 

Honestly, I am pretty confident that everything is going to come back okay. But I don't know that for sure, and I won't until a doctor confirms it.

Over the last few weeks I have had many awesome people asking me if I have heard anything yet... and I always respond with "No, they didn't have the results yet, but should by this friday". 

As I responded with that for probably the 50th time this week, I had a thought... Why am I not calling my doctor everyday to get answers? Why am I okay with just waiting to be told the results?

Is it that I really am that confident that it is okay? Or is it more along the lines of I'd rather pretend that everything is fine as long as I can? 

After much thought, I still don't know the answer to these questions...